Stop Being a Douche : Improve your Communication Skills
I can’t think of a time I didn’t respond to someone’s DM, email, or text (albeit, late- these days, with the texting!) That’s because someone who I know, someone I’ve spoken with, someone who has a question for me or an interest in what I have to say, OR someone I actually know, personally- has taken the time to send me some words. I value words more than almost anything. Words and time. Those are two of the main components of this planet we all live on.
So when someone starts misusing words and time, I kind of have a problem with it. Lately, I’ve noticed this falling into one of two categories.
COLD PITCHES
What is the deal with the uptick in cold pitches lately? I’m getting them on LinkedIn, Instagram, and email. Are people more desperate for work right now? (And believe me, I get it.) Is it some glitch in the algorithm? I have been receiving around 2-7 cold pitches/day on these platforms combined. They mystify me. The people sending them mystify me.
There is a place for cold pitching. People have built empires around the concept of reaching out to a stranger and pitching them a useful product or service. I come from the camp of “hey, let’s try a conversation first.” That’s just me. I would rather play the long game, get to know someone, see if I can truly help them (or vice versa,) and then feel REALLY, REALLY GOOD about making a purchase from them or having them make one with me. The people who send 100 templated pitches a day- I can’t help but think they are living in another time. The land before time (aka pre-pandemic times.) I just made that up now.
Just a few years ago, it was all the old stuff we’ve been taught. Hustle, hustle, pressure, pressure, pain point, pain point. And it worked for a while. After we all were forced to take a break from normal life, many of us realized how many things could be different, more authentic, more fulfilling and more relaxed. Hopefully, if nothing else, we learned how truly valuable life is, and how precious our time is.
I don’t want to spend my time cold pitching strangers in hopes that one person will maybe, possibly give me the time of day. I personally find it degrading.
To all you cold pitchers out there- try a new way. Instead of your old copy/paste, or follow/pitch, or “how’d you get into copywriting,” and fire away on question 2- let’s explore if there’s a more human approach. Maybe some good old fashioned research? I’m not even talking like more than 10 minutes of research. Just enough to find out if you are genuinely interested in having a conversation with this person- since after all, you are accessing some of their time without their permission.
There are plenty of cold pitching resources out there- none of which I am an expert on, but one in the copywriting world is Bree Weber- Cold Pitch Strategist. There is an ethical piece that is important to this approach, and I believe Bree covers that in some detail.
And perhaps the worst of all of the cold pitches is the cold pitch denied. You cold pitch me. I take the time to say hello, thanks for connecting, not for me at this time. And you ghost me because I wouldn’t put money in your pocket. That’s all you saw me as anyways (which I could have guessed based on your lack of research or interest in who I am and what I do.) Don’t be that guy. Respect yourself and those you are pitching with even the most baseline of pleasantries.
So while we’re on the topic…
GHOSTING
Okay, what the fuck? Are we not friends? Are we not colleagues? Are we not loosely connected somehow via the internet? Did you literally reach out to me about a job you think I’d be a perfect collaborator for? Did you not ask what my rates were and tell me you’d get back to me?
If yes to any of these, why aren’t you polite enough to respond/update/book a date/or let me down gently? We are all busy, (again, I GET IT!) I never think anyone should be too busy to acknowledge someone’s need for an answer on something, ESPECIALLY when you are the one who initiated the conversation and ESPECIALLY if what the person is waiting on is imperative to their life/livelihood/schedule. Have some decency and send a one liner email giving them what they need to move forward, whatever that means.
Remember what it feels like to be on the other end of that cold pitch/unanswered message. It sucks. Don’t do that.
